Postcards and Gobbledegook

eDar Tom#

Were hvaing a lovel time ear in the outsside world.
Theres somuch to dea and doo, and these Frinds are fantastoi==ic. The Wandering Whalers have just arived and are whaling egernetively, causibf am eerie ambiance ro rezonate throughouy this lush and granf lanfscape.

Thomasina syas hi, and the Zmobie is all in one piec still. He’s met another zombi we thing, and he’s keping himself to hiself. Quitte literaly. The Bogeman and Creation are calling all sorts of trouble, ex[ecially with the animals; the peacocks and the shep wont go near them… but tat said, tey won’t go near the Plesiossoaur. The Bogeyan and the Creation that is, not eh animals. And none of us will go near the dragons. Freightful beats.

We’’re almost ready for the gatering. although we dont know when itis yet. We will fond out soon enough.

Msut drat now – epxloring to do!


The above is an email postcard I received this morning from Fingers, my Inner Typist. Throughout October, he wants to be known as Fabgers – oops, Fangers. And his typing skills haven’t improved one iota since he’s been away. (For those of you who have been on the dark side of the Moon, Thomasina, Fingers, Zombie, Bogeyman and Creation have all managed to escape the confines of my Inner Mind, and are now out in the real world, exploring the Grinds apparently. I think they’re there for the Gathering, the night when the folk from all Halloween legends get together for a well behaved bash. I don’t know why my Inners want to go, being honest, they aren’t frightful in the slightest, but each to their own, I suppose.


I’ve also been reading through my Spam folder today, I don’t get many corkers nowadays, but these are kind of funny all the same.

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Someone with an unpronounceable squiggle for a username said:

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I blush, Squiggle, I really do. Wait. Are you saying I don’t write this?

John D said:

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Well you don’t want to add it improperly, John, especially Feedburner whatever that is. If you find the validity, please let me know where it is. Are you the same John as earlier? jghgdsrtfkfh

And John P said:

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Spooky! You’re the third John in my Spam Folder with a different initial yet you sign off with utter gobbledegook. I bet you’re the same person – aren’t you? –  pretending to be different Johns. I know how you spammers work. That said, I’m glad you like this story. I wrote it all myself… please tell Squiggle that when you see him / her / it. hfikfgwehl

There. Spam horrors dealt with and deleted. Now, back to Halloween.

The Wolf Within

Legend says it’s the Full Moon that causes transformation. Legend has it wrong.

When the Moon is Full, the beast within takes physical control, changing appearance, personality and stature. Basic instinctive needs must be met, no question. The chase, the race, must be won at all costs in order to survive. The Wolf must feed.

Legend doesn’t refer to the time of the New Moon, the time of the Inward Transformation. Introspective realisation shows the beast lies waiting – not dormant – ready to reveal itself should the need arise.

It’s a New Moon tomorrow. Time for change once more.

Slightly Spooky Totally Silly Limerick 9: Transfixed

There was something about the eyes
Which seemed to take me by surprise
I stood there transfixed
As the witch did her trick
And left me hypnotised

There’s always one, isn’t there? A face in the crowd that seems to stand out over all of the others who are gathered around. Could the reason be due to that particular person having a unique hypnotic ability and they unknowingly mesmerise their unintended victim? Who knows? If the person doing the hypnotism doesn’t know that they’re doing it, and the person who has been hypnotised is in a trance, how would they know?

Deep thoughts indeed generated by this Slightly Spooky Totally Silly Limerick, brought to you by Beyond The Sphere. This is the ninth in the series. There can’t be that many left now…

Slightly Spooky Totally Silly Limerick 8: Siren

She foamed at the mouth as she screamed
This wild siren, thing of bad dreams
The sailors who saw her
Tried hard to ignore her
But failed miserably in the extreme

According to Greek Mythology, the Siren is a sea nymph who lured sailors to their doom, as she sang sweetly. The Siren featured in this Slightly Spooky Totally Silly Limerick (brought to you by Beyond The Sphere) doesn’t have a sweet singing voice, but she uses what she does have to the same catastrophic effect.

My ears are still ringing and I only imagined her.

Slightly Spooky Totally Silly Limerick 7: Phantom

The phantom of the hallway appeared
All backlit and gruesome, I feared
I switched on the light
He ran away in fright
And I simply stood there and cheered!

They’re still coming, these Slightly Spooky Totally Silly Limericks, brought to you as always by Beyond The Sphere. But fear not! They shall be ending soon.

One hopes.

Slightly Spooky Totally Silly Limerick 6: Witchcraft

Making sure they’d rolled their Rs
The circle then ummed and ahhed
They’d cast their spell
They thought went well
Until they were all seeing stars

A strangely magickal Slightly Spooky Totally Silly Limerick brought to you, yet again, by Beyond The Sphere. Are these things never ending?

Slightly Spooky Totally Silly Limerick 5: Mummy

On a spooky dark night in the museum
Walked the unravelling mummy called Liam
As he was very old
He did feel the cold
Just like his possessing demon

Yet once more, Beyond the Sphere brings you another Slightly Spooky Totally Silly Limerick. And this one is a two-for-one special! And, if you look closely, you may just see the demon’s face staring out from the mummy’s chest!

Slightly Spooky Totally Silly Limerick 4: Coven

The witches looked on in despair
At the surrounding ten empty chairs
”This is a joke!
We need more folk!
What’s a coven with nobody there?”

Sigh. Another Slightly Spooky Totally Silly Limerick, brought to you as always by Beyond The Sphere. This one actually bears some relevance, as this is the thirteenth post for this Halloween month of October, and, unlike the one featured above, covens consist of thirteen.

This blog isn’t just about silly posts, you know… there are educational facts secreted throughout. The next post, however, may not contain any. And, like buses, it’s right behind this one.

Slightly Spooky Totally Silly Limerick 3: Ghost

The host is the ghost with the most
Who loves to serve hot tea and toast
But he’s all of a flutter
When he’s out of butter
And margarine’s not even close

A picky ghost who loves serving afternoon tea. Whatever next?

This Slightly Spooky Totally Silly Limerick has once again been brought to you by Beyond The Sphere. Who says blogging’s dead?

There was going to be an image of a ghost here, but even that wouldn’t be seen alive with this post

Slightly Spooky Totally Silly Limerick 2: Witch

Agnes the witch was a red-head
Who constantly sported a bed-head
Until someone saw her
And much to her horror
Bundled her into a bedspread

Witches have long been persecuted, since early times, for many reasons including bad hair.

This Slightly Spooky Totally Silly Limerick has been brought to you by Beyond The Sphere. Quality posts may be a thing of the past, but they can also come back into vogue.

This one even sailed through the spell-checker.